Late night, and here I am. Sitting, thinking, biting my lip. What is
this strangeness? This sadness? The cold doesn't make it numb. Is it the
dim light? Maybe I could brighten the place up, but can that brighten
my heart . . . do I even have a heart? I mean, I feel warm and fuzzy
sometimes, but most of the time I can only feel the misery this causes
me. The misery I cause to others, knowingly, unknowingly. I must stop
biting my lip, it causes the bleeding.
I do see the knife. I do see the veins. They say it's like an adrenaline rush, feeling it pump out. But no, its a coward's way out. Plus, I don't have a tub to lay in and do it. The mess it would make on my floor. But then there is this feeling, and I can't seem to get a hold over it. Its not happiness for sure, not about the newest crush that I have, not PMS, not the cold. By the way, it is 18 degrees here, so suck it.
But then again, what is it?
I do see the knife. I do see the veins. They say it's like an adrenaline rush, feeling it pump out. But no, its a coward's way out. Plus, I don't have a tub to lay in and do it. The mess it would make on my floor. But then there is this feeling, and I can't seem to get a hold over it. Its not happiness for sure, not about the newest crush that I have, not PMS, not the cold. By the way, it is 18 degrees here, so suck it.
But then again, what is it?
